The Lost Children of Haiti….

February 9, 2010

There has been much debate about the lost children of Haiti. As of recently I have heard “Who do we think we are to take the children away from their culture and heritage” to “These children need families and there are families here to love them…put politics aside and see that there can be goodness in people’s hearts”.  This got me thinking….because I help families deal with these issues on a regular basis.

A wonderful adoptive mother that I know asked me recently whether or not I had an opinion on “what is too much or too little when it came to introducing her adopted child to his/her culture”.  She expressed opinions that her family and friends had given her and was struggling with finding a balance for her family.  I like to keep my opinions to myself as much as possible because I like to believe that my job is to “guide” my clients towards the answer within themselves (sounds corny I know…but so true!) but I can share stories (anonymously and details are changed to protect identities) to help others touch on possible scenarios that they can relate to and maybe learn from.

In terms of my opinion here is what I can say. I do know that each and every person always has his or her opinion. And most likely no ONE person is going to be able to please everyone. Right and wrong can be such abstract qualities. How do you KNOW someone is right? How do you KNOW someone is wrong? Is there a tangible way to know for SURE? When an act is committed is there a light that goes off above that says “THIS IS WRONG”. When it comes to loving your biological child, adoptive child or a child in another country that needs a home…. can you really call is WRONG? There are times when opinions will point to an alternative approach that may be more suitable or more ideal. But let’s be honest, in our daily lives I would say each of us makes at least one decision a day that isn’t the absolute, most right, most ideal decision…ie; like that cinnabun I had for breakfast this morning instead of that healthy egg white I swore I was going to have 😉

Now of course, raising a child and breakfast decisions are like comparing apples to pasta….. and I don’t intend to imply that the course of a child’s identity be compared to a breakfast decision. My only point being…. let’s embrace the kind hearts of all of the millions of people that get up every day and try to make it a better place for you, for me and for their child…however that child came into their lives. Let’s have faith in the knowledge that families come together in the most miraculous of circumstances. A lot of time…miracles happen because a whole lot of RIGHTS and a whole lot of WRONGS come together into a beautiful, chaotic, unparalleled mess.

To the little babies and children of Haiti who have been forever separated from their families, my only dream for you is that you find your miracle, big or small, and touch the hearts of many.


One Response to “The Lost Children of Haiti….”

  1. Courtney Says:

    Keri, this post is so right on. I love it, I think you offer a unique opinion because you are a mental health practitioner and adopted. I know that I believe that all children deserve a loving home, regardless of race. I look forward to move blog pieces from you, as they are always so well thought out.

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